Posts from — June 2009

I had a phone interview the other day for a permanent position within the department I’m currently working in as a contractor. While I wasn’t actually dreading the interview, I had this fear that I was going to somehow accidentally sabotage myself.

And I sort of did.

I won’t go into the specifics of the position and the company here so I’ll be as vague as possible…

The interview was going pretty smoothly until I was asked a question that I have never been asked and have never thought I would be asked. I sputtered a bit and tried to think of something half way intelligent to say and finally did say something. Unfortunately, this spun off into something I didn’t foresee but should have. Long story short, the HR person sort of made it sound like I would eventually leave this job for the same reasons I quit my last job.

*facepalm*

I somehow explained my way out of the hole that I dug for myself and we we continued from there, talking about other aspects of the job, benefits, and all that good stuff.

I talked about the interview with a coworker and explained the above to her. She said it was a positive sign that we talked for a while (a 1/2 hour) but I just shrugged my shoulders.

I’ll find out by the end of this week if I have an interview with the hiring manager.

If not, no worries. It’s all good.

(Of course, maybe I shouldn’t be telling so many people about something that is so uncertain.)

Ten years ago, I graduated from high school, give or take a few days. I walked across the stage setup at my high school, shaking the principal’s hand while proudly taking my empty diploma holder (actual diploma to be picked up later) amidst the claps and hollers of the few people I actually knew among the 500+ people in my graduating class.

I already knew what I wanted to do in college and I figured within four years I would graduate, have a job lined up upon my last days of college, and everything would be hunky dory, so to speak.

Or not.

While not everything turned out the way I thought I would, I’m still really fortunate to be where I’m at right now: working with savings, being there for my family, and having a few really good friends (the kind that understand me and put up with my sarcasm and the weirdness that overcomes me with lack of food or an excess of caffeine). However, I’m still trying to find out what I want to do “when I grow up” even now, ten years later and a few weeks shy of my 28th birthday.

I used to think it was all about the money. Happiness would come with the bigger paycheck, I thought. That was the mentality that I had back in high school but in the ten years since, I’ve been leaning towards a different definition. Happiness is about figuring out what I want to do and and to just quit worrying about all the things I don’t have control over, an incredibly bad habit of mine.

Now I need to find what makes me happy, InshAllah